Now that my "husband / fiancé / husband to be" is here with me I try my best to have as much leisure time as possible for us. We decided that I will not take too many vacation days during his stay as we for sure need them. A few for a short trip maybe in May or June and most of them for our planned wedding and honeymoon in late summer.
Now I'm struggling between work, being a good wife and enjoying the precious time we have together.
Who ever said life is easy has never tried to change his old behaviors. Whenever I'm alone I don't care too much after a long working day on how to spend the evening. I'll find something to eat in front of TV and that's it. Being together now means I change these habits as I want to have a nice proper dinner and a cosy relaxed evening.
Why am I writing just now you may think - I just sit on the couch next to my husband who is focussing completely on a movie, rarely noticing if I say something ;-)
Men and action movies, I watch them only if we made a compromise like today action but therefore tomorrow comedy or romance...so tomorrow it's my turn to focus on a movie.
He deserves his time out really as we have been on the first big family gathering last weekend and he was in the focus of almost my whole family. Twenty five persons all keen to meet my precious one. This weekend will be just ours and the plan is to do nothing except of eating, snuggling up, watching movies and having a cosy time. Leisure time as its best.
My mind is crowded during these days with everything related to our planned wedding.
A wedding is exciting but what do you think a binational wedding is? I didn't thought that it's so hard to plan as you need to keep in mind the timeframe.
Biggest problem for us will be the final date.
As long as all personal documents from my future husband are under review we just can stay calm and wait for a reply. This reply is essential for the further planning as it could be good, means everything is ok and we can go ahead and schedule a date, but it could also be that we have to bring something additional and the whole package has to be send in again for a review.
As not even one of these papers has to be older than six month we are facing a tight schedule.
What does it mean exactly? It means we have to plan a whole wedding within a half year but we won't be sure until around eight weeks before the wedding if it could really take place or if we have to start the whole process again.
Did someone ever planned a wedding within six month? I think that's already a challenge but what about eight weeks?
The main problem is that we cannot invite someone more than eight weeks before as we will not have a date. And who will be able to confirm his or her attendance without exact dates?
Therefore we have no clue how many guests we will have, how much food we need or which location will fit.
A wedding planner will quit his job at this stage as its almost impossible to book a location within eight weeks unless you don't care about how it looks like. I do care! The last I want for my wedding is a crappy location. To get out of this challenge we said we will have a small intimate celebration with just family and best friends around so that all will fit in the garden of my parents house.
This plan was nice until some became aware of our upcoming wedding.
The draft guest list went from around twenty five to fourth five within a couple of weeks.
It seems as if our loved ones are sure they will be able to attend without knowing a date, which is causing us the next problem. My parents garden is really so nice but it's not a park!
Where to start and where to stop now? I have no idea, my fiancé will be here with me in a few days and I can't wait to discuss all these things with him face to face instead of talking on Skype with interrupted connections from time to time.
Until then I try to stay calm and stop thinking too much. Everything happens for a reason and I believe in it even when reality let me struggle from time to time. As long as I can think it was fine in the end.
Faithfully, Miss Faith
Do you know the feeling of being fed up after working more than ten years in the same area? I have it and I'm more and more thinking what I may do for a living with having the enthusiasm I had when I started my current job.
The problem is that I'm stucked in my area when it comes to experience and almost all employers ask for experienced staff and are not hiring newbies.
But am I really stucked or is it only my mind?
I spent the last couples of weeks more and more with thinking about what to do instead of my current job. And what I realized is that there is always another possibility.
Our experience is never only job based, it's cumulative experience of what you did at work, how you grew as human, what you experienced in life and how you are going on with others.
The school of life is a never ending one and we went through class after class, some realize it and think about it, others just take it as it is.
What am I currently?
I'm a project manager in the clinical research area, I'm a thirty five year old woman who is finally planning a life together with my love like a grown up, I'm interested in several topics like music, art, writing, personality, traveling, psychology, and so on.
A previous blog post which I wrote myself just brought me on the next idea. If I wouldn't see a reason in writing posts up to now, that is the moment where I appreciate at least for myself. I'm sure if I would never have pinned it down somewhere I wouldn't had realized.
It was about the training I attended in Madrid and just opened my eyes once again.
If I am a project manager, what does it mean? It means I'm able to handle project and in the best case bring them to a successful end.
So why am I stucked in the research area? I'm not, I just have to find out thoroughly what area could be handled by me.
My goal is to change in near future into the travel planning area. But not the planning for typical tourists who go into an agency and book the two week all-inclusive holidays once per year. that would be boring, at least for me.
I want challenges and contact and real planning instead of typing dates into a system which delivers me a certain choice of offers to book.
When I travelled with my best friend to the Caribbean a luxury travel agency was handling everything for us. These agencies are consulted by people with enough money to spend. Persons who don't care if the costs are more than expected when the result is fulfilling their expectations.
Why do I think that I'm able to do it?
One of my strengths is communication, if I communicate with clients, doctors or heads of hospitals or if I communicate with airlines, hotels, guides or restaurant, there is not a big difference, in the end the result has to be fine.
If I go through my strengths I can see the parallels, I just have to switch them to another area.
Scheduling appointments with different persons in my current job or scheduling when which of my clients in traveling would like his breakfast, lunch or dinner is nearly the same.
Planning and organizing is my day to day work since more than ten years, instead of planning my business trip I am sure to be able to plan leisure trips for others. I've been in many different hotels in my life so far and checking somebody into a three star hotel instead of the five star he wants is something which wouldn't happen as I know the differences in standard. But I also know that five stars aren't the same all over the world.
What else? English fluently and in writing as well as handling different computer systems is not a real challenge.
So what am I waiting for? Honestly, my fixed salary at the moment as I know we need it to plan the next two years. But this means also that I have the next two years time for research in traveling. Where are the agencies I would love to work for, how is the range of salaries for people stepping in from the side without the typical education, what do I need to have on my CV before applying and many more.
Anyone who has experience is very welcome to comment and send me some tips or website links, I would love to learn as much as I can upfront!
Thanks and never lose the faith, we are more than we think and not limited just because we chose something years ago.
Miss Faith
Lessons learned during my stay in Italy...
Even if you lost a battle in love never stop to believe in it!
It will hit you when the time is right and then:
I don't know if I'm just too stupid or if Facebook is not making this task easy for users.
Miss Faith should have a Facebook page to distribute the posts on another channel as well.
The first problem was that I have a private Facebook account where I'm connected to family, friends and colleagues but as said, this is private.
You may ask yourself now if and for what reason I want to hide my activity completely from them. It's not about 'hiding' but to be honest I don't want to have them commenting just to please me and I also don't want some of them to know what I'm doing in my private time as long as I'm still "rehearsing". My closest friends will be or already are aware but first of all my aim is to get real feedback. And last but not least I have some Facebook "friends" which were maybe real friends years ago but aren't actually present in my real life as well as colleagues, which don't have to know me in a more private way. I restricted some of them already on my account but we all know how stories, news or gossip is spreading quickly. If they find the page themselves, then ok, but I don't want "secret agents" there.
During the last years we always heard lots of discussions about privacy in regards to Facebook and the last thing I want is that all of them are aware of this page. So what did I do?
I started another account with another email address. Miss Faith wasn't taken as name because according to Facebook "Miss" is not considered a first name so here we go, Missie Faith has now a 'private' account.
I'm still wondering how many of the celeb kids will be able to register as Hazel, Peanut or Peach...
Nevertheless, Missie was created and after the click on 'create a page' I was able to have finally a "Miss Faith" page.
I hope that I will not turn into a schizophrenic with all these pseudonyms.
Miss Faith's page needed a set up and this was and still is the next big task. When trying to share posts it was sometimes "Missie" sharing them and sometimes "Miss Faith" - here I need to find a rule to fix it. But the best is for the moment that I'm now temporarily blocked.
Thanks to Facebook.
They blocked me because of too much uploads within a certain time, the certain time is invisible to me as it seems to be their secret. I just got the message that I may abuse the system or bother my friends too much with a high amount of uploads. Very funny, which friends? This page was just created and before trying to get friends or "fans" it needs a set up. Who will click "I like" on an empty page?
Their second secret is how long the blocking will last. The information I got is that it can last from a few hours up to thirty days. That's really specific. And even worse, as soon as I try to upload something and am still blocked they may prolong it - aargh.
It is as if I say to a friend please don't call me within the next hours up to maybe thirty days and if you try it within this period I may prolong the time not answering your calls.
Now it means for me I have to be patient, one of my worst characteristics. I'm not patient if I want something and they force me to be.
If I finally succeed and can move forward in setting this up I will be really carefully.
Yours, trying to be patient, Miss Faith
Could writing be my destiny?
Sometimes I'm thinking if I could be able to make a living out of writing, if I'm able to set up a plot in a direction that others like to read it. The main problem currently is that I have no idea when and where to start. There are stories popping up out of my fantasy and vanish as I haven't the time to sit down in this very moment to get them on paper.
And what about all the thousands of rules authors should keep in mind? If you start to google it will bring you even more away from the initial idea as it seems to be so complicated. On the other hand I cannot imagine that all the big authors were sitting in front of their drafts to check them for rules. Isn't the miracle to pin down what your fantasy is telling you? Sure there are re-reads and corrections needed but is that the most important?
On the other hand the main problem is to find the time besides a full-time job and a relationship. I cannot start to write during working hours and my husband would be annoyed and think I have a big spleen if I would focus the remaining time on writing instead of a couples life.
A never ending circle where I have to find a way to break through.
The first step for me at the moment is my writing here. This is at least a good opportunity to check for myself if there are persons outside of my comfort zone which may like to read what I write. And even this is not as easy as I thought.
How many blogs do we have on the web? I never started to count as this would be a 24/7 job for the next weeks. It seems as if I'm not the only one trying my writing skills in front of an audience. A blog needs to be cared about and to be updated, improved, adapted and so many things more. Also a permanent audience is something you need to work on. No one will just step over my personal blog and think I'm the greatest writer ever without me feeding him or her with new stories. Stories are the next key point. Which stories exactly meet the audience I would like to see for myself, this is again a key to find out and needs efforts from my side. So bottom line, where am I now after around seventy published posts?
Yes, right away at the start. The time where I discover day by day a writing style, how to find post ideas and discover what I like to write about.
One thing I learned already for myself is that the story of Miss Faith is a life story where not everything is fitting which is randomly popping up on my mind. So if you haven't seen it yet, for all my random thoughts about different aspects in life, pictures I love or quotes which inspire me I opened a second blog called "Random thoughts" (misssfaithrandom.blogspot.de).
Is that all? Again a surely said no. I need to find ways to distribute what I'm writing, means different channels to get a bigger audience. For the time being I started with this blogspot account and connected it to google+ and twitter. Next step is to create a Facebook page for Miss Faith. This task is a big challenge, at least for me. Why is that? As it will be another story to tell stay tuned, there will be a post about my struggles while creating it soon.
Last key, and here I need you, are comments on my posts. I would love to get some feedback on everything. Everything means do you like how I write, the topics I'm writing about, how this blog is set up, what do you think in general about "Miss Faith"? I don't want to be pampered, if you dislike it please tell me also as this is the only opportunity for me to improve.
Thanks and take care,
Yours Miss Faith
I already wrote about my first single vacation in Italy and just stepped about notes I made on one of the last days being there.
What I wrote down is the following "observation" I made while sitting alone in a gelateria with an astonishing sea view:
Never ever do I want a relationship like the ones I saw abundantly during these holidays. Bad educated, spoiled children, parents which fight each other beyond words if they should go for a swim in the midday heat or if the junior, who didn't had proper breakfast, is allowed to have ice cream or not.
Wife and child just leaving the husband/father behind like a fool although he may has been the one working the whole year to afford these lovely family holidays alà dolce vita and couples not able or willing to break the silence which may exist between them since years.
No wonder that these poor fools die-away looking after single women - whereas they probably wouldn't if they knew what's on my mind. Your own fault, you douche bag, you should be able to create your own life and it seems as if you aren't able to do so. I honestly rather accept a few skeptical glances instead of not being able to decide if I eat three ice creams in a row and lay down to catch sunshine in the midday heat. I even could go for a swim in the middle of the night if I like or skip breakfast and eat Pizza in the morning.
Women wearing these not fashionable trekking sandals (while sitting is a cafe and now trekking area within miles), too dumb to use an iPhone, meal-rimmed glasses on their noses, unvarnished and hair on the head which needed a makeover weeks ago - can they honestly believe that this is attractive? A short khaki colored skirt with senseless stitched on pockets will not improve the overall picture, even not if you look at the not pedicured feet...
Some women are wearing jewelry, these are unornamental, even if they believe that the all inclusive ribbon is posh...
Now thinking about these scenes I'm still laughing and more than happy that my relationship is far away from entering this stage (mashalla - let it stay like this). If it would nearly go into this direction I will step back to this post and remember that I never ever want to be like this! In this short observation are already so many things I don't like that I don't anticipate me in a situation like this. Fighting in public AND in front of the kids about nonsense, my husband longing for other women because his is not making any effort to be attractive to him any longer...sorry to say this now, but women who stop to be women because they are wives and mothers shouldn't be too astonished if their husbands are starting to look after other skirts. I don't say it's an easy job to handle all at once but everyone needs time outs so why not using them for painting toenails or having the hair done every now and then?
Regards from a fresh manicured Miss Faith!
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